Saturday 22 August 2015

Hmmm...delicious chocolate balls - no cooking, no sugar, no worries!

Cacao Balls

These are a winner in my house with the adults who appreciate something to curb the sugar cravings and even with the kids who, at this stage, are convinced they're "chocolate balls".

Ingredients
200g blanched almonds or pecans or walnuts or a mixture - whatever you like!
1/4 cup pepitas
2 tablespoons chia seeds
250g pitted dates
1/3 cup goji berries (can substitute with low-sugar craisins if you're not worried about the sugar)
1/4 cacao power
2 tablespoons water
1 teaspoon vanilla bean paste
1 tablespoon rice malt syrup (optional - you don't have to put this in if you want them to be 100% no added sugar but I like the way it helps the ingredients bind together)
Coconut for rolling

Instructions
1. Put the 200g of mixed nuts in a food processor and finely chop
2. Add all the other ingredients into the same food processor and finely chop (you should end up with the mixture being like a lumpy-paste)
3. Roll the mixture in to balls and coat with coconut
4. Refrigerate, preferably covered, for about an hour (they can then be stored in an air tight container in the pantry...I'm not sure how long for as they never last longer than 2-3 days in my house!).

Enjoy xo


Wednesday 12 August 2015

It's confronting for a lady to be bald!

I can't wait for my hair to grow back!  Yes, this is partly vanity but, more importantly, it will stop the 'side' conversations my husband, sister and parents are frequently required to have.  Well meaning folk (who are not privy to this awesome blog ;) often pull them aside to say "is your wife/daughter/sister OK?" and so the explanations start all over again...

Not sure why I'm blogging about this - I think to highlight the extended effect this annoying disease has and to thank my beautiful family who equally shoulder the burden.   xox

Monday 10 August 2015

What TO DO for a friend who is sick

I have had the most overwhelming level of support from my family and friends, my work and even relative strangers following my cancer diagnosis.   I cannot imagine those poor souls that are forced to endure these experiences alone (makes me think [again!] about how I'm going to squeeze community service into this busy life!).  This support has taken many forms so I thought I'd share the most helpful....

My top tips for what TO DO to help:
1. Cook healthy dinners.
Isn't it funny that when someone is sick we have a strange desire to feed them something unhealthy (cakes, cookies, chocolates). Pre-cancer, I would have been the first to do this (as my chocoholic reputation would demand) now I understand that a good, healthy dinner is one of the most useful gifts someone can provide.  My beautiful mother's group have rotated this gift and once a week my family receives amazing dinners (from hearty beef & veggie casseroles to chicken & veggie pies).  Instead of going to the supermarket, cooking and cleaning I literally get a couple of hours back in my day where I can rest, recover and/or spend non chore based time with my children.  XoXo

2. Arrange play dates
(A) Kids.....compare (1) an afternoon with Mum who can't lift you for a cuddle, can't play footy, is slightly hazy given the drugs (OK-maybe that part could offer some entertainment!) and has turned into a bit of an anti-sugar tyrant versus (2) an afternoon with kids of a similar age where you can run, scream and load up on lard/sugar.
(B) Husband.....a day out at the footy could be just what the doctor ordered for this over-worked, under-paid but greatly appreciated Chief Support Officer!

3. Helpful gifts
I'm not talking about expensive presents.  I mean little gifts that practically support someone's recovery.  For example, my wonderful Mum knitted me a beanie in a particular colour I needed to match existing clothes, my gorgeous cousin found a 'funky' beanie, my thoughtful Auntie gave me a little glass jar to put a fresh flower in each day, a generous friend from work gave me a mindfulness book & diary and another kind friend gave me a special memento that helped her through a similar battle.  A very smart friend gave my husband some strong coffee beans to cope with being both Mum & Dad at night!

4.  Do some errands
A 'cancer-friend' (what a strange title!) told me about her support network which included someone going to the Organic Markets for her and another friend who collected the dry-cleaning/walked the dog/posted mail etc.  I haven't had as much need for this but it sounded super practical and helpful to me!

5.  Be yourself
Drop the awkward and have a laugh!

Sunday 9 August 2015

What TO SAY to someone who receives bad medical news

When someone we love is sad or angry we have an overwhelming urge to 'make it go away'.  We comfort them with words such as "it's OK", "stay positive" or "it's great they found it early".  People are so fundamentally uncomfortable with these two emotions that they inadvertently ignore them or blatantly dismiss them!

I was speaking to a friend today who requires a hysterectomy due to complications following the birth of her 2nd child.  With all good intentions her family and friends have been telling her how lucky she is that she's had 2 children....which, for her, has been translated as - don't you complain that you can't have a 3rd.  Inside she is grieving, angry that a really fundamental choice has been taken away from her but outwardly she is 'not allowed' to complain.

I think back over some of my friendships and cringe as I reflect on 'advise' I have given friends who struggled to have a 2nd child.  I recall myself saying "you have such a beautiful son already" etc etc At the time there was nothing but love and caring behind the words but in hindsight I see how unhelpful they are.  So, firstly, my sincerest apologies!  Secondly, yes there are some people who can not have any children (and I feel deeply, deeply sorry for them) but offering someone 'perspective' when they are stumbling down their path of grief is, unfortunately, like telling an amputee not to worry as they have another leg.

My top tips for what TO say:
1. "That sucks!"  Let someone be angry and/or sad.
2. "There is no f..... silver lining to cancer".
3. Say nothing!  Let them talk, grieve, vent, hurt
4. Ask them if they actually do want to talk about it.  Perhaps they've had enough of explaining what the doctors said and when the treatment(s) will be?!
5. Offer your support, help and shoulder - solutions aren't necessary

Friday 7 August 2015

Hospital Beats - Song #3: Losing Raspberry

Envisage 'angry' music.  You know, that hard core heavy metal where there are so many guitar notes smashed together you can't actually decipher a tune and the lead singer is screaming rather than singing.  That's the back drop for this hospital beat.  Raspberry (AKA my right drain tube) has been given the thumbs up to be removed....

I smiled naively at the nurse when she walked in, blissfully unaware of the pain she was about to inflict!  She took a good 10 minutes to work her way through all the tape they had used to secure the drain tube (apparently stitching it into my body wasn't enough!).  Each time she tugged at the tape she put pressure on my significant cuts and at one stage was using my recently placed 'bolt-ons' as the anchoring point for her hand.   I was working up quite a sweat in an effort to manage the pain but otherwise kept my cool (although "an angry song" was brewing).

She then warned me I'd feel 'a little sting' as she cut the stitches.  I shut my eyes and breathed deeply. Sure enough a few 'little stings' but overall quite manageable.  "Ok, now you'll feel another little sting as we remove the tube.  Can you take a deep breath in for me Sarah?"

I did as I was instructed, taking a big breathe in.  The nurse proceeded to "remove the tube" whilst I screamed in my head every c-bomb, f-bomb expletive I could think of in the angriest song I'd ever heard.  A LITTLE f@#!ing sting - it felt like she'd taken a hot iron rod and dragged it from my arm pit to my waist.  "There we go love, it's all done".  Luckily for her I've been built with this firewall that prevents me from getting angry at people.  

I smiled wearily and sank back in to the pillows - my only thought was, oh my goodness I have to do that all again with Strawberry!  The nurse put some padding on my side, then clicked her tongue in disapproval.  "Hmm, there's a little bit of leakage" she said as she swapped the padding for a thicker variety.  A third pad was used and finally after 10 awkward minutes she was satisfied she could tape it up.

I have subsequently found out that this nurse forgot to turn off the suction before removing the tubing.  So whilst the tube was coming out, it was diligently still sucking out whatever it passed by...hence the burning sensation and pile of gunk!  

Sunday 2 August 2015

Hospital Beats - Song #2: the sound of sleep

One of the most important things about post operative care is sleep...a string of professionals swan in and out of your room telling you to "get some rest" (the irony escaping them that they've just woken you?).  I particularly like the 3am obs! Hospitals are really not condusive to sleep!  As the night time shift settles in and patients make their way to bed (or roll over from day time to night time position) the sounds of the hospital start...

In the room next to me is a tiny lady who has developed a unique coping method - whenever she is required to move she makes a rather high pitched "whoop, whoop" sound.  It's really a very difficult sound to replicate and given she is probably in pain I feel quite awful that it makes me smile.  Across the hall is a generous man who coughs up a lung every 2nd hour!  Room 203 houses a poor old biddy who must be suffering from some kind of inertia as she's constantly telling nurses she's falling.  And of course all the rooms have that steady rhythmic beat of the electronic drips that every now and again make a rather abrupt and rude "ping" when the saline bag is finished.

Whoop, whoop
Cough, cough
FALLING!
Ping

Whoop, whoop
Cough, cough
FALLING!
Ping

You see, give anyone some decent hospital drugs, and they'll think they're a musician ;)